the beast wakes from her snooze...

in space no one can hear you scream...

This explains a lot (well, not really):

"He became vice president well before George Bush picked him," Wilkerson said of Cheney. "And he began to manipulate things from that point on, knowing that he was going to be able to convince this guy to pick him, knowing that he was then going to be able to wade into the vacuums that existed around George Bush — personality vacuum, character vacuum, details vacuum, experience vacuum."

Woof! And the space between his ears? Is that a vacuum too or does the wind whistle thru?

love me some kinison...

Christmas night, the Bro was kind enough to drive me back from Portland as I was feeling poorly. When we got to my place, we figured some stand-up on Comedy Central would be the ticket. But Jeff Dunham, who is decidedly not funny, was all there was.

Sooo before I finally crash 2nite, I thought I'd post this for Bro, wishing him & his lady a Happy New Year, 'cause I jest know it'll make him laugh.

世界的末端...

This supersedes the previous post.

The beauty of it all is that it's apolitical -- unless, of course, it was God who threw the rock.

the 2nd american civil war: circa 2010...

And this time to the foreign nationals go the spoils:

He based the forecast on classified data supplied to him by FAPSI analysts, he says. He predicts that economic, financial and demographic trends will provoke a political and social crisis in the U.S. When the going gets tough, he says, wealthier states will withhold funds from the federal government and effectively secede from the union. Social unrest up to and including a civil war will follow. The U.S. will then split along ethnic lines, and foreign powers will move in.

And then whitey becomes the illegal.

I love that the east coast (although KY? TN? SC? Not!) joins the EU. Enlightenment is not yet dead. However, that Texas gets gobbled up by the "Messicans" is hysterical to me, not to mention poetic justice. Let it be Mexico City then that brings Dubya to trial for his War Crimes (or is that just "gallows" humor?).

Canada gets the breadbasket (smart move, Ottawa!). Of course, China getting California is a sad development. I figured Japan as putting in a claim beyond just Hawaii.

Ahem, note the Ruskies reabsorbing Alaska. Allll that oil! I can see ol' Putie Poot's head floating over Wassila, moaning, "Sarrrrrahhh! Sarrrrrahhh!"

My sense is 2010 as being a hair early, although the scenario does have a more palpable certainty about it, thanks to a certain hair-brained boy president.

Put Sarah in charge, of course (You betcha!), and I'd be bumpin' zero-hour up to January '09.

says the lib blogger...

Sometimes it pays to be far down the food chain.

it's getting easier being green...

Leo DiCaprio's new ride: the all-electric sports car...

Yes, bartender, I'll have one of those.

i feel yer pain...

Shhhhh... !!

A South Philadelphia man enraged because a father and son were talking during a Christmas showing of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button took care of the situation when he pulled a .380-caliber gun and shot the father, police said.

This oughta give ol' Naahm, a.k.a., CCG2 a chubbie.

montezuma's revenge: north of the border...

It would be more than mere cliche to say some of my best friends are Republicans. Hell! I was a Republican once myself. At the time, however, I was also a teenager. Read from that what you will.

But -- dear God! -- the party has totally devolved into a cabal of vile little assholes:

Included on the disc was a musical parody of "Puff the Magic Dragon" entitled "Barack the Magic Negro," sung by Shanklin imitating black civil rights advocate Rev. Al Sharpton, first played by Rush Limbaugh on his syndicated radio show in March 2007.

Tennessee, eh? Think that coal sludge getting into the drinking water has fermented a little more quickly than they anticipated?

But then, what's Alaska's excuse?

engaged...

Tom Brady & Gisele to tie the knot...

another one bites the dust...

Eartha Kitt: 1927-2008

My first exposure to her was as Catwoman in the Batman TV series. Later was drawn to her performance in St. Louis Blues.

Awesome CD Miss Kitt To You (C'est Si Bon) -- favorite cut: Avril au Portugal.

yah, so what... !?

There was a time when something like this would've made me insane.

freaky deaky...

Look-alike city:

Current "in the news" gay-bashing Evangelitan Rick Warren...

Washington Caps owner Ted Leonsis...


Whack-a-doo character actor Victor Buono...

----------
Update:

Luciano Pavarotti?

No? Did I go too far?

a maine winter's evening...

Dateline:  Maine Street -- The temperature at last check was 12 degrees (indeed feeling like minus something). The walk home was bracing, no lie, and I am made to once again look forward to spring.

another one bites the dust...

Majel Barrett Roddenberry: 1932-2008

Her romance with Roddenberry earned her the title "The First Lady of Star Trek." A fixture in the "Star Trek" franchise, her roles included Nurse Christine Chapel in the original "Star Trek," Lwaxana Troi in "Star Trek: The Next Generation" and the voice of the USS Enterprise computer in almost every spin-off of the 1966 cult series. She recently reprised the voice role in the upcoming "Star Trek" film directed by J.J. Abrams.

it's ok if the jews are gay (mantra o'the day)...

Well here's an interesting turn for the worm:

[S]ome interesting quotes from Warren from 2006, talking about how he'd visited Syria and found it to be a place of moderation and religious tolerance -- including tolerance towards Jews, who in reality are barred from government jobs and who are singled out for special identification and discrimination in other ways.

Wow! Quite the mess he's stepped in, our Prez-elect. Just having thrown the LGBT types under the bus with his selection of Rick Warren to invoke a prayer at his Inaugural party, turns out these pro-Syrian comments will most assuredly piss off the much more powerful Jewish lobby. So if he pulls the plug on Warren now, could that not be interpreted as a second smack of the gay?

It was only last night that I was thinking the pick to be fairly stupid because one could tell Obama would never pick an anti-semite or a Klan symp to prove his "broad-mindedness," although that reeeeally would've been, uhm, broad-minded had he done so.

Turns out my thoughts could've been a tad hasty. And Dubya hisself couldn't've done a more heckuva job.

bill o'reilly, call yer ofc...

Al Franken projected winner in Minnesota.

Dog gone it! People like me.

another one bites the dust...

Deep Throat: 1913-2008

Mark Felt, Bob Woodward's great mysterious unnamed source, 2nd most central character in All The President's Men, integral in bringing down the most corrupt presidency in American History, that is until 2001.

----------
Update: a little late, but, well, the dust is bit: Linda Lovelace: 1949-2002

a provisional thank you to manny...

Never thought I'd say it...

Scott Boras is agent to both Mark Teixiera and Manny Ramirez. If the Yankees signed Teixiera, where does Manny go? The Yankees would be less likely to sign him, given they already would have two $20M ballplayers, inc. A-Rod; the Red Sox don't want him; the Dodgers can't afford him; and the Angels manager Mike Scioscia would kill him before they got out of spring training. So Boras wants Teixiera to sign with the Sox so Manny can go to the Yankees.

Unless the Washington Nats sign Teixiera.

But who in their right mind would choose the Nats over the Sox? Chaatoes? Baker? HAMstah?

Does a body really need the extra $20M after getting $180M?

Sox get Teixiera then; Manny gets booed at Fenway 9-10X-a-year.

feedback to the feedback to the irreverence...

Old poker-buddy and fellow former UMie/DC softballer H-Mac takes exception via email to my contempt for all things Bush:

You can't really mean what you said on your blog about the 3rd shoe being the charm. No matter how much you might hate a US President you can't be in favor of any President being attacked . . . This is like a fight outside the family. You and your brother I assume fought plenty when you were kids and at times felt like you "hated" each other but god forbid if some outsider tried to pick a fight with you or him I assume the other one would have come in full steam swinging to protect the other one. We can fight amongst ourselves plenty but when outsiders attack one of us with such blatant disrespect it demeans all of us.

... to which I responded:

you and i differ on who the outsider is... or isn't... the incident happened in iraq... the shoe-thrower is an iraqi... ipso facto: bush was the outsider...

and, to borrow a time-tested metaphor that works aptly as a pun: put yourself in the other guy's shoes:

imagine if uniformed "outsiders" from an invading force came crashing through your house door, blew you away and did unspeakable acts to your wife and kids... or let others do so, when you were only a while ago safe & secure in your persons...

or maybe you weren't blown away, but were made to watch said unspeakable acts, then taken away to a prison where less-unspeakable acts were done to you, including being sodomized, bitten by dogs, tortured with electrical devices, smeared with feces, etc...

now wouldn't you want to throw a shoe at the bastard who ordered that done... ?

not that i'm into conjuring such images, big guy, but that sh*t went down, and most of it was done to bystanders and other assorted innocents, not just actual "insurgents"...

america can't be "america" anymore, old boot, not until bush is prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law... or gets hit in the mush with a freakin' shoe...

the demeaning of the office, and our country, wasn't done by the shoe thrower but the occupant himself...

when told of this, the president is quoted to have said: "so what?"...

Thinking of buying a fir for that special someone?

When undercover investigators made their way onto Chinese fur farms recently, they found that many animals are still alive and struggling desperately when workers flip them onto their backs or hang them up by their legs or tails to skin them. When workers on these farms begin to cut the skin and fur from an animal's leg, the free limbs kick and writhe. Workers stomp on the necks and heads of animals who struggle too hard to allow a clean cut.

When the fur is finally peeled off over the animals' heads, their naked, bloody bodies are thrown onto a pile of those who have gone before them. Some are still alive, breathing in ragged gasps and blinking slowly. Some of the animals' hearts are still beating five to 10 minutes after they are skinned. One investigator recorded a skinned raccoon dog on the heap of carcasses who had enough strength to lift his bloodied head and stare into the camera.

Stay warm now! And Happy Holidays!

baby needs a new pair of shoes...

A shame this dude wasn't three-legged, the third being the charm and all.

----------
Update: From HuffPo:

Bodyguards quickly wrestled Zaidi to the floor and hauled him, kicking and screaming, from the room. Two other Iraqi journalists were briefly detained after one of them called Zaidi's actions "courageous."

Amen!

i use'ta be catholic but i gave it up for lent...

So what's the big deal? Had I known mother Mary was such a babe, I'd still be going to confession.

----------
Update: That the simple-minded see the Virgin's image in buttered toast, on fence-posts, or on MRI scans fergawdsakes! -- and proceed to fall to their knees, I am left to the position where I cannot be bothered when they get so blamed exercised over such displays. Begone, simple-minded!
----------
Update: Dare to resist: More on The Virgin Maria.

well, alrighty then...

Dig UMass upsetting defending nat'l champs Cans-Ass!

anything to get laid...

One stunningly amazing bird! (Click YouTube window a second time if the embed is disabled, which should take you to the vid at YouTube directly.)

A chainsaw??

another one bites the dust...

Bettie Page: 1923-2008

The pin-up girl is dead.

Long live the pin-up girl!

yahoo chess update...

Wow! I just had one of my better games in a while. I'd been in a slump of late, losing to mediocrities, also-rans, other assorted losers & thugs, and, by doing so, joining their ranks. Usually, my rating is in the high-1300s with extended dalliances in the low-1400s. Once or twice I've gotten over 1500, but my water usually seeks its level 'round the 1390s to 1420s and assumes the shape of its container. And with this last win, I am once again within hailing distance of said shape:

Rating: 1316
Games Completed: 4539
Games Abandoned: 327
Wins: 2768
Losses: 1605
Draws: 166
Streak: 1

The guy I beat came to the table with a rating of 1512 and left at 1487. I started at 1291 (sucking the pipe, as I've said) and, as you can see above, stand at 1316, less of a leap for beating a 1500s type than I would've thought, but what're ya' gonna do?

Like I say, I rather liked the game I played. Here it is:

;Title: Yahoo! Chess Game
;White: its.poonam90
;Black: gpammons
;Date: Thu Dec 11 08:46:55 GMT 2008

1. e2-e4 c7-c5
2. f1-c4 e7-e6
3. g1-f3 a7-a6
4. o-o b7-b5
5. c4-e2 c8-b7
6. d2-d3 h7-h6
7. a2-a3 d7-d5
8. e4xd5 b7xd5
9. b1-c3 b8-c6
10. c3xd5 d8xd5
11. c2-c4 d5-d8
12. c1-f4 c6-d4
13. f3xd4 d8xd4
14. f4-e3 d4xb2
15. e2-g4 a8-d8
16. f1-e1 b5xc4
17. d1-a4+ b2-b5
18. a4xb5+ a6xb5
19. d3xc4 b5-b4
20. a3xb4 c5xb4
21. e1-b1 g8-f6
22. g4-f3 f8-e7
23. c4-c5 f6-d5
24. f3xd5 d8xd5
25. b1xb4 o-o
26. b4-b5 f8-c8
27. a1-c1 f7-f5
28. g2-g3 g8-f7
29. b5-b7 f7-f6
30. c5-c6 e7-d6
31. b7-d7 d6-a3
32. c1-c2 d5xd7
33. c6xd7 c8-d8
34. c2-d2 a3-b4
35. d2-d1 f6-e7
36. g1-f1 d8xd7
37. d1xd7+ e7xd7
38. e3-d4 g7-g5
39. d4-g7 h6-h5
40. g7-f6 g5-g4
41. f1-e2 b4-c5
42. f6-g5 d7-d6
43. e2-d3 c5xf2
44. d3-e2 f2-d4
45. g5-f4+ d6-d5
46. e2-d3 e6-e5
47. f4-d2 e5-e4+
48. d3-e2 d5-c4
49. d2-f4 d4-g1
50. e2-f1 g1-d4
51. f1-g2 c4-d3
52. h2-h3 d3-e2
53. h3xg4 h5xg4
54. f4-g5 e2-e1
55. g5-f4 e4-e3
56. f4-d6 e3-e2
57. d6-b4+ e1-d1
58. g2-h1 e2-e1+
59. b4xe1 d1xe1
60. h1-g2 e1-e2
61. g2-h2 e2-f3
62. White resigns.

And we move on.

kopbusters...

i LOVE this story!

Wondering if my favorite public defender does as well.

Next time, could we, like, "sting" the cops with Tasers? I mean, fair's fair -- yah?

assalaamu 'alaykum, my people...

That's right, don't let 'em forget it:

In case you were wondering, yes, President-elect Barack Hussein Obama will use his full name when he is sworn in on January 20th.

Because it needs repeating and often: Stupid people (and only stupid people) think Barack Obama's a Muslim. The really stupid people have a problem with his middle name, and I say rub their noses in the concept that the world's changing despite them.

I've said it before, I've come to know and, from time to time, work with Muslim people, and have found, like everybody else I know, there are some very decent folk within the community as well as your serious jag-offs.

You know: It takes all kinds... ?

In fact, I'd've been delighted if he was Muslim and still got elected.

----------
Update: Of course, he could be one o'them Ay-rabs, like I been sayin', and the plan all along is to wipe us good Christian white folk off God's good Earth...

... but I digress.

war on christmas science...

'Jesus Was Born in June', Astronomers Claim

And that is why these Evangelitan bastards have conniptions, my children: They're challenged to think twice about all their religious bullshit, and they, instead, decide it's simpler to make war on science -- and whine about a war on Christmas.

h/t to HuffPo...

in other words: lie... !

The Bush Legacy - Talking Points

Tell them I brought "Honor & Dignity" back to the White House.

vintage polaroid swinger commercial

Oh my Gahd! I was just reading about Polaroid ending it's production of instant film in 2009. So I looked up the Polaroid Swinger, my first camera in, like, 1960-something -- ONLY $19.95!! -- and found the original commercial jingle right hyar. Wow! I'm TOTALLY having groovy flashbacks!

[P.S., That'd be a young Ali McGraw taking the pic.]

another one for the history books...

Just blew the last game of chess online, forgetting I set a timer when I mostly play without -- and Ding! But then I'm driving a cab in an hour and I really don't have any time for this nonsense anyhow.

Last night was the slowest shift I've had since starting with the company (netting me all of a coupla Jacksons) and I'm getting the sense that Obama's right, that it's gonna get worse before it gets better. All very disturbing, thank you.

I have images of breadlines in front of billboards depicting American prosperity and my being too weak from hunger and depression to not give a shit about the irony anymore. Then I snap out of it, sample some caviar and sparkling wine and I'm all better.

That last sentence is meant to be ironic too.

oprah, call yer ofc...

As much as I loathe Karl Rove, this looks like it'd be a fun read:

Also reserved for between the covers of Rove’s book is his checklist of the “great many of the political actors in this town (who) never accepted him as a legitimate president.”

“I’ve got behind-the-scenes episodes that are going to show how unreceiving they were of this man as president of the United States,” Rove said, adding: “I’m going to name names and show examples.”

Maybe he could call it "Profiles in Courage"?

What? Oh!

a claustrophobic cul de sac, that...

There goes the neighborhood:

"I am afraid with all the negative press the president has been getting, the whole neighborhood is going to be a target," said the woman, who refused to give her name.

Credits to Navy beans the Bushies don't actually move to a cul de sac. Imagine, if you will, a march of tens of thousands -- the kind you see every so often from, say, the White House to Capital Hill.

Oh! Did someone mention it was racially exclusive? Ironic in this case given it'll be the white guy who devalues the neighbors' properties.

yoo stinkah... !

I knew I liked Berkeley for a reason:

On Monday, Berkeley's city council will vote on a proposal by its Peace and Justice Commission as to whether they will recommend war crimes charges for the UC Berkeley constitutional and international law professor. If passed, the measure would also order UC Berkeley to provide alternative courses to Yoo's class at the Boalt Hall School of Law.

I'm unclear as to the jurisdiction and what the city thinks it can do to modify a state college's curriculum; maybe enforce it by zoning their parking spaces over to Oakland. Regardless, what's important is making certain the spotlight burns ever hotter on this loyal Bushie sociopath.

And may they all burn thusly.

another one bites the dust...

Paul Benedict: 1938-2008

Coupla items with this guy: I loved the mad painter, having watched Sesame Street well past the age limit, mine that is. (Hey! I dug Maria.) But here the guy says, "I'm going to paint an '8'," then sneaks up on some bald schmoe lazing in a pool, paints an '8' on his chrome dome, and then books it when Baldo discovers he's been, uhm, scalped.

That and Benedict seriously looks like my brother-in-law. So adieu, Mr. B!

the greatest dog trick ever...

Empathy.

worstest... !

There is what I think to be a humorous anecdote, and which I like to tell, about my father, with whom I'd been frequently at odds. During my adolescence and young adulthood, we would constantly argue. And one day I was telling my mother about the most recent dust-up, the circumstances of which illustrating perfectly the absurd proportions of the relationship:

Dad: "You always argue with me."

Me: "I don't always argue with you."

Dad: "There you go again!"

Curiously, the headline of this piece -- Rove Defends Bush: He's Not Worst President Of Past 50 Years -- reminded me of that back & forth with dear old Dad. The world at large has been saying for at least over the course of his second term that Bush is the worst president in the last 50 years (and, for my money, since the dawn of time). And here we have the most aptly named "Turdblossom" -- give or take the blossom -- begging to disagree.

The point being, the mere denial of a circumstance cannot alone define whether the circumstance exists or not. And in this case, a Rovian denial notwithstanding: George Bush is the worst president in the history of the planet, including the last 50 years... and, uhm, maybe I always argue with my father.

----------
Update: Of course the neo-dicks hang their hats on Jimmy Carter's reign of ineffectualism in response to the question as to who might've been the worst president. It says here, however, that at the very least, Carter brought Israel & Egypt to the peace table... and, uhm -- Oh yeah! -- he left office with a budget deficit of a now-miniscule $50 billion. Now what the hell has Bush ever done that could be deemed as remotely worth a damn?

why won't they die... ?

Jeb Bush Ponders Florida Senate Run

Oy! -- Bush fatigue, anyone?