Wednesday, August 31, 2005

GOP Declares War on Science

Not an original or even recent headline, I grant you; just the most recent assault on another front. I had the misfortune of having to meet the chucklehead Barton back in the mid-90s when I was working a beat on the Hill for The People's Radio Network. (By the way, never believe a word Pat Choate tells you.)

Anyway, the sense I'm getting here inside the beltway is the Repos are feeling the heat about the Iraq debacle and genuinely fear losing control of Congress in '06. And so they're throttling up their grand scheme to completely disembowel the federal government, or as much of it and as fast as they can, from any further oversight as it pertains to the corporate fancy, in the event they are indeed kicked to the curb and not nearly soon enough.

P.S. A shout of solidarity to Raymond Bradley, director of the Climate System Research Centre at the University of Massachusetts. Keep fighting the bastards, Ray!

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Gary Hart for President

Hey, why not? I was a Rockin'-25 in 1984, and I thought Ronald Reagan was a serious asshole. But having witnessed the current squatter, this utter abomination in cowboy boots and rictus personality barking banalities like "They Hate Us for Our Freedom's on the March!" or "It's Hawrd Werk!", why I get positively all sniffily over the Gippah! And now that the erstwhile Senator from Colorado came out with this, I thought, "Well awwwright!!"

Lookey here: the way Hillary and Biden and Bayh are going, I figure I'll be a-going too -- to Europe that is, 'cause there ain't NO WAY I'm playing ball with these ankle-grabbing DLC drones. They are the Pod People... ! They're sell-outs... !! Watch to see how quickly they roll over for John Roberts next week. Biden's already a steaming sample unfit for the cat's box, what with his steerage of the Bankruptcy Bill and enthusiasm for CAFTA. What a prick!

"Bayh!!" says you?

"Bye!!" says I.

Right now, I figure the choice is Feingold, although he's starting to give me the heebeejeebees with his 6-of-1/half-dozen-of-another over John Roberts.

And if not Feingold, why not Gary Hart? Ok, probably not. He's been a litte too chewed-up by the scandal mill and by time, losing too much of the luster he once had. Ach, the ignominy of getting punked by Walter Mondale. And that was before Donna Rice.

Al Gore... ? Hmm... Lately, he's been every bit the firebrand we always knew he could be ever since he bitch-slapped William Buckley, the moderator, over SDI at the '88 primary debates. He's acknowledged his 2000 campaign lacked the courage of his convictions, and that he never should have listened to the neutered inside-the-beltway campaign consultants (I mean, Warren Christopher... ?? To run the fight in Florida post election day... ?? What, Barney Fife wasn't available... ?? At least he kept a bullet in his shirt pocket.) -- and he still WON the thing. And lately he's been ramping up the rhetoric on Iraq and Global Warming.

The perfect parallel, of course, is 1960 loser and VP Dick Nixon. He skipped an election cycle in '64 (well actually he lost again, to Pat Brown in the California Senate race) and came back to win it in '68. So why not Gore? The timing seems to be perfect, especially since the current crop of enablers cannot seem to learn from John Kerry's meltdown.

Just keep those frickin' inbred DLCers out.


Call your attention to Jonah Gelbach's endeavor, now posted as one of my preferred sites.

Not to be confused w/the NRO's Goldberg, this Jonah's an old softball buddy and fellow Minuteman alum >Rrrrah!<. And from what I can see on his blog, he also has a bigger vocabulary than me (annoying, that). And just as I've come to know him from the diamond and poker table, his writing is ruthlessly prolific and unapologetic. More to my delight, he has a special, uhm, affinity for Rick Santorum, perhaps the smarmiest of the Jumbo Shrimp (which is sayin' a lot).

Jonah's true blue, and his blog is a must-read.

Arianna: The Neo Gray Lady

To think Al Franken once referred to her as "The beautiful but very evil Arianna Huffington"... Is there a better daily publication, on-line or on the newsstands, than The Huffington Post? When it comes to effectively casting grappling hooks in order to haul down the towering but darkly corrupt Gullivers of our time, Huffington goes for the jugular, be it Tim Russert's of Meet The Press or Arthur Sulzberger's and his New York goddamn Times:
It’s pathetic, really. And wildly counterproductive. For far from rallying support for Miller, today’s pitiable plea instead calls attention to how little support for Miller there actually is… even among the Times’ own op-ed columnists. Not one of them has written a single word about their incarcerated colleague during the entire month of August[.]
I'm looking forward to the day when Judy Miller is released from the slammer. I suspect she'll be expecting garlands and cheers, when, out of the sea of microphones and flashing bulbs, someone, not buying into the Joan of Arc routine Miller will inevitably be attempting to project, and ask, "Did you sleep with Ahmad Chalabi?"

"How about Karl Rove?"

"Has your husband returned from La Cote D'Azur yet... ?"

What was that line in RoboCop... ? Ah yes...

"I'd buy that for a dollar!"

Monday, August 29, 2005

The Enemy of My Enemy

I was in London a couple of years ago and found myself agog at all the Starbucks emporiums there were. It seemed to me from Fleet Street to Kensington High Street to Piccadilly and back there was a Starbucks on every block and a pub on every corner, and me with so little time.

Back here at home, I live in the [urp] burbs and spend way too much time transiting to my offices in the city and back again. Consequently, the only expedient spot to pick up breakfast-to-go is the nearby Starbucks at the strip mall.

Now I've always objected to mega-corps on principle. Their penchant for voracious expansion, anti-trust behavioral disorders, pounding the consumer when not screwing the labor (or while they're screwing the labor) -- you know the drill -- usually triggers my gag reflex. The best example, and only across the divide at the strip mall is a Wal-Mart. Google those SomeBitches when you have a year. Suffice it to say I don't do Wal-Mart.

As for Starbucks, I found them objectionable the day they bought out my favorite hang-out in Harvard Square (and corresponding franchises, of course), the Coffee Connection. Moreover, I laughed hysterically one Saturday night while listening to A Prairie Home Companion on the radio. An aside by Garrison Keillor when he referrenced "It's a Starbucks, "or as I like to call it: 'Ten Bucks!'"

Be all this as it may, a piece in today's Seattle Times has thrown them in a newer light:
A national Christian women's organization is accusing the Seattle-based coffee maker of promoting a homosexual agenda because of a quote by author Armistead Maupin, whose "Tales of the City" chronicled San Francisco's homosexual community in the 1970s and 1980s.
Remind me to explore further why I consider "Conservative Christian" as an oxymoron akin to "Jumbo Shrimp." And yeeaaah -- that's now the working title of all my future rants about the Holy Rolling Bible Thumping Arse Buggerers (and how's that for irony??) -- The Jumbo Shrimp Report. Watch for it!

Meanwhile, if you crave a breakfast sandwich, Starbucks' beats McDonald's' hands-f'ing-down. At least the eggamuffin at Starbucks is toasted, eliminating the rubbery texture. Moreover, ol' Mickey D's doesn't have Eggs-Florentine McMuffin's, now do they... ??

Throw in an Iced-Vente-Americano, and your total comes to $5.73. Thanks for coming by.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Questions That Get You Kicked Out of the Press Room - #2

Mr. President, your earthly father once explained why he stopped short of invading Baghdad during Operation Desert Storm by saying -- and I quote:

Had we gone the invasion route, the U.S. could conceivably still be an occupying power in a bitterly hostile land. It would have been a dramatically different--and perhaps barren--outcome.
My question is, sir, do you derive any satisfaction in proving your earthly father right?

Questions That Get You Kicked Out of the Press Room - #1

Due respect, Mr. President, can you pronounce the word NU-CLEE-YER?

Said, "California is the place y'oughta be."

Another reason why I love The Golden State; reported by AP on Saturday:
A group representing California religious schools has filed a lawsuit accusing the University of California system of discriminating against high schools that teach creationism and other conservative Christian viewpoints . . . The Association of Christian Schools International, which represents more than 800 schools, filed a federal lawsuit Thursday claiming UC admissions officials have refused to certify high school science courses that use textbooks challenging Darwin's theory of evolution.
More on the "scientific" frauds of Intelligent Design, a.k.a. Creationism Warmed Over, another time. California's doing all the Progressive heavy-lifting in this country, no thanks to Hillary, Joe Biden or Joementum. Note they're also getting sued by the federal government for insisting cars sold in the state have to meet raised fuel emissions standards; standards established by the state because Congress is owned part & parsal by the auto & fossil fuel industries (when not by the Pharmaceuticals, HMOs, et al., but we digress) and is incapable of legislating practically or productively and would rather roll-over, splaying their hind-legs, while the creature we call president humps them mercilessly when he isn't otherwise consigning our bravest to die for no other reason than that we, The American Driver, may continue to [heart] our Iraqi oil and go on with our mindless and obsessive burning of more gas and more gas and more gas. [Insert sound-effects from the trough here.]

What, you really thought Dubya was a sufferagist?

Of course, by federal government we mean this administration's so-called Justice Department doing General Motors' & Haliburton's bidding, and, while doing so, instantly converting years of Repo noise about "States' Rights" into so much methane only to be blown out the collective aft chute. Now that's an energy plan!

Of course who the presiding panel of judges are, hearing either case, makes all the difference in how the merits [politics] will be determined.

John Roberts, the president's on line-one again -- uhm, don't tell anyone... again.

Friday, August 26, 2005

"If You Can Keep It"

Ben Franklin's response, when asked if the Continental Congress voted these United States to be a Republic or a Monarchy, was said to be, "A Republic, if you can keep it."

Well we've lost it, assuming we ever really had it in the first place. Measureably one might go as far back as 1960 as the Nixonians would have you believe, although some contend they were doing in southern Illinois what they accused the Kennedys of doing in Chicago. But certainly in 2000 We The People were deprived of our say, beyond, that is, our indicating our preference for the other guy and by more than a half-million votes, not including the 2 million more that went to Ralph Nader. Would it be fair to conclude, then, that had Nader forseen the long-term damage his candidacy hath wrought (while keeping in mind we remain entirely sympathetic with his reasons for running, while paradoxically holding his stating he'd do it again as contemptuous), at least 3 quarters of his votes would've gone to Al Gore?

Same thing in 2004, only it was electronically, thus far more rampantly, corrupted, and consequently less easy to prove. Which is why one Republican congressman called for exit polls to be federally banned. That way, you see, the discrepancies in vote-counting, causally related to the criminal slight-of-hand, would be complete but beyond notice. All of this, of course, is deemed "non-news" by the corporatized 4th estate. We'll have a rant about that down the road.

Despite all of this, it appears the Republic will not be returning to health anytime soon. Check out that last graf on the link.

Which now begs the question as to what kind of government is the United States left with? A Plutocracy? An Oligarchy? A Fascist Dictatorship?

(D) All of the above?

I'm beginning to get the sense of how right Thomas Jefferson was when he suggested that in order to maintain a healthy Democracy/Republic, bloody revolution would be necessary every 25 years or so. Something about watering the roots of the tree with the blood of patriots.

Having endured the stench of this presidency for 4-1/2 years now, we hold these truths to be self-evident.

Beware the DINOs

Give the Repos credit, they put lipstick on a pig and called it the DLC. But don't be fooled: A Republican-lite is still a Republican. And if there's any question as to whether Will Marshall is a Repo stooge or if the Democratic Leadership Council isn't at best Vichy, then you can be sure the questioner is one of them.

Scarier still is Hillary's one of them too. Russ Feingold, we need you... but not if you intend on grabbin' your ankles for John Roberts.

Ye' foller... ?!

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Evolution in Real Time

The Arizona Daily Star reported yesterday that John McCain is now on board in advocating Intelligent Design as a scientific alternative to evolution and ought to be taught in our public schools. The Star also indicates the Senator didn't stop there:

"On Tuesday, though, he sided with the president on two issues that have made headlines recently: teaching intelligent design in schools and Cindy Sheehan, the grieving mother who has come to personify the anti-war movement."
Not yet announced as official is the Senator's intention to pursue his party's nomination for president in 2008. Relatedly, unconfirmed reports say the Senator's start-up campaign committee is already planning to modify his 2000 campaign theme, "The Straight-Talk Express," in order to conform with his evolving positions and rename it "The Straight-Talk-My-Ass Express."

Wednesday, August 24, 2005


In the beginning, Man created god, who in turn created heaven and the earth.

Every point in that universe is the center.

Therefore I am the center of the universe.

Humbly submitted.